“You should be here. You should be close to 4 1/2 years old … playing, laughing, learning, growing … a part of my every day, my life, my family, my all,” wrote Hannah Rose Allen, who is now a pro-life advocate. “Instead, I must carry the weight of your absence for the rest of my days on earth.”
Allen said she’s been full of regret, grief and sorrow since she made the decision to terminate her pregnancy at six weeks.
She also told the child, whom she referred to in the letter as “Luke,” that “a part of me died with you” when she chose to terminate on Feb. 6, 2009.
“I was distraught as you grew, distraught as I took that little pill that I thought would ‘fix things’ and distraught afterwards,” she wrote. “I can hardly bear it that I did not fight to protect your life, like a mother should.”
In the letter, Allen told her son that she tries desperately to imagine what he would have been like, as she imagines him playing and enjoying life. But the finer details are difficult to discern.
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